Black Sheep

After thinking carefully i messaged A and told her to go ahead wth her plans to Bali. It hurts to be left behind coz it was supposed to be our plan. Our holiday. But if i tell her not to go than i'm being selfish rite? Making decisions that not necessarily to our advantage is part of growing up rite?

Than why do i feel so crappy? I'm upset. Sad that i dont belong anymore. Sad that i'm the black sheep. But than again, maybe i never belonged anyway. Oh! I thought that , as i'm getting older i'll be less emotional. Less dramatic.

Dear, i wanna follow as well. I wish you guys can wait for me as well. As much i try to keep a straight face, i do get jealous as well. Than again i know u care about my feelings. Jst the rest dont. Haih! This feeling sucks!

I want to be there! Where am i supposed to find people to go to Bali with me? Any takers?